Mothers Day 2012

Well today was one more step down the road to not being able to take me any where.
It seems I can’t stop shouting things that are better off left in side my head like
“I have to poop!”
or
“Pull my finger!”
Today I became that embarrassing person who we all know (And love?)
It was Mothers Day 2012 and my Mom wanted to go the Olive Garden. Sigh… hate the Olive Garden.
But it’s Mothers Day and that’s what my Mom wanted to eat.
I arrived about thirty minutes after the rest of my family and found them cowering in the one very small patch of shade to be found in San Bernardino on a hot and humid May morning. It seems every Mom in the 909 wanted to visit the Olive Garden on this 90 degree day, so my family spent some quality time sweating together in the smoggy sunshine. It was going to be an hour or more wait, and I was so thankful I had not been on time. Besides I had already scored a lot of points by getting her a couple of custom door mats with pictures of her beloved dogs on them, she absolutely loved them so I think I’m off the hook for being late!

As soon as I walked up to my family, the first words that popped out of my mouth were
“Grandma, your new wig looks great!”
Then I realized that maybe I should have said that a little quieter, maybe that was embarrassing?
But not as much so as one minute later when my Grandma told me to check out her new boob,
“It’s huge!” she proclaimed, loudly.
Oh yes, we were getting looks by this point.
That’s when my Dad, loudly announced he was going to go inside and sit down in the men’s room until our table was ready.
If my 82 year old Grand Mother starts talking about her new boob that is my Dad’s cue to leave the conversation.
Yes, my family loves to loudly proclaims info best kept to selves in public