You know you have been alone in the forest to long when you find yourself saying, “Carly have you seen mommy’s ax?” I was obviously talking to the dog. I may have been camping with her to long as I’ve started to refer to this little ding a ling as “Princess” And “Sweet heart” I may …
This week I decided to be a vegan. That decision lasted about four days than I was baking liver for my cats food (and also snacking on chicken liver) and then I remembered, damn it! I’m a vegan! (This week) I suck at being vegan. Vegans don’t eat organs. I’ve had the most riduclous stomach problems …
Today I ran as fast as a dolphin. As my boyfriend pointed out it must have been a very slow dolphin. I spent my early morning cursing the traffic of southern California. One whole hour to drive twenty three miles is just uncalled for So Cal and I just do not appreciate it. I was …
“Babe, I think I have typhoid” I’m laying on the couch in pain for the third day straight. “How can you possibly have Typhoid? You just got vaccinated for it and we are still safely in California!” My boyfriend is staring at me from the couch, the image of Donald Trump’s ginormous face reflected behind …
When I find myself constantly weaving my way around a chihuahua in a sweater leashed to a cart in Stater Brothers and keep getting glared at by the tiny purse dogs owner every time her dog tries to dart in front of my shopping cart that’s when I know grocery shopping the morning before thanksgiving …