I’m not going to lie, I have not had a haircut in a year. My hairstylist has pissed me off so badly with her years of flakiness that I’m done. 2025 is the year to cut out ridiculous friends, colleagues and flaky acquaintances. This is why I shove keto French toast at my face. It distracts me from how much I can’t stand other humans.
It’s been a few rough winter months. Recovering from a sprained ankle has me less active than I have been in years. That has left me watching way too much Fox News. Now, that is not good for anyone! My liberal friends may not believe this, considering I am one of those kooky Trump supporters, but I also read Al Jeera News and BBC News every day on my lunch break.
2025 dawned with my best friend, the woman who taught me how to trail run and changed my life, not making her way into it. After a fifteen-year courageous battle with lung cancer, Alicia couldn’t live in a world with Donald Trump as president again. No, seriously, I think she decided it was time to go and be with the Lord because a second Trump term would kill my liberal friend. Or maybe it was the cancer cells. Or really, she just thought it was time to be in heaven running trails with Johnny, her soulmate, and the late great trail dog Pups. However, it worked itself out. I’m beside myself with fury that of all people, to share with me that my friend passed away, my ex-hairdresser never reached out to me with this news. As animal lovers, we had a pact. When Alicia passed away, Tina would call me. She would text me, she would FB message me. She would keep me in the loop. This is why it’s difficult to be friends with potheads. Because they melt their brains and then they can’t be there to communicate the big life events.
I had already decided next time I needed a haircut, I’d go to someone else months ago. I have been begging Tina to make me look like Joan Jett for years. I just want all the shag and all the layers, is that not so much to ask? Instead, all I get is a trim and a few layers every time and I walk out feeling like I just wasted a hundred bucks on a haircut. This really is frustrating when you are leaving on a five-week vacation, camping, and sleeping in a motorhome for five weeks with limited showers. I wanted less hair damn it! I articulated this point! Many times over! Just like I articulated when Alicia passed, please communicate with me so I can help rehome her animal farm! I’m from a small town. Neighbors are supposed to act neighborly and I’m just done with flaky people here in 2025. This was the last straw.
One thing I learned from Alicia, besides how to run trails, was that life is too short for ridiculous people in your life. The more time I spend with people, the more I just want to be with my dog. I seriously mean that.
When life brings on stress, make French toast! Even better, make keto French toast! It will help you forget that you have no friends because they are all assholes!
Now the question is, what is the best keto bread for Keto French Toast? There are so many choices out there and you want to try a kind that does not taste like cardboard. I tried many different keto bread products in the last two months. This Inked Keto Timber Wolf Bread from Costco seems to be the best one on the market. And being that you can buy it from Costco, it’s pretty not crazy expensive for a keto bread product.
Now, what is almost as expensive as keto bread products? Trying to find a new hairdresser here in 2025! I never imagined I would be paying my hairdresser almost as much as I pay a mechanic for car repairs! Now that I need a new hairdresser, I have been calling around in my small town and literally, it’s between $250 and $300 for a cut and color! What the actual fuck? It costs basically as much to get a trim and cover up my grey hairs as it would cost to get a brake job done on my Jeep! I’m all for people being able to make a decent living, whether it’s mechanic or a hairdresser but how can anyone afford gas for their car, nine dollars a dozen eggs and a three-hundred-dollar haircut? This, right here, is why I get an annual haircut.
Keto French Toast with Apricot Stilton Cheese
4 slices of keto bread
4 eggs
1/2 cup of Greek yogurt
1/2 teaspoon of cinnamon
1/4 cup coconut oil
1/2 cup crumbled apricot Stilton cheese
Sugar-free honey or maple syrup to drizzle on top
To make the keto French toast, whip the eggs with the Greek yogurt. Mix in the cinnamon. Heat the coconut oil in a pan. Dredge your keto bread in the egg wash. Fry your keto bread for the keto French Toast, both sides in the coconut oil. Serve with the apricot Stilton cheese and a spritz of the keto honey or sugar-free maple syrup.
