So today I almost died at the doctor’s office. The great thing about passing out and being in excruciating pain after having an allergic reaction to a steroid allergy shot is that I had the privilege of waiting an hour to be harassed with modern medicine before I almost died.
And this, right here, as I laid on a dirty waiting room floor, is why natural allergy medications rock!
Why should you throw away the Claritin today and Xyzal and buy local honey?
Because local honey won’t make you pass out! Unless you are diabetic!
Bee pollen won’t lead to hours of excruciating pain in your arm! (Unless maybe you are extremely allergic to bees?)
Welcome to my allergy shot nightmare
I haven’t Passed out in public for awhile so I guess I was overdue to embarrass myself. After waking up on a dirty linoleum floor, the friendly nurse helped me lie down on the exam table, I was so embarrassed. I lay there for thirty minutes, clutching my right arm in pain and I just kept thinking, I would rather sneeze 300 times a day than be in this kind of pain. It was just a little allergy shot, 125 milligrams of Solu-Medrol, how was that corticosteroid shot killing me? Well, it turns out steroid allergy shots are extremely painful. Oh and guess what? They also have an extremely long list of side effects; such as insomnia, nausea, weight gain, irritability, muscle weakness and heartburn. I’m feeling irritable just thinking about the chemicals flowing through my veins now as I type this and I may need to go ingest some Candied Sriracha Bacon until I feel better.
Cortasteroids also suppress the immune system so after your fucking arm stops aching you may be susceptible to other people’s germs. It would have been just fantastic if the nurse or nurse practitioner had explained to me just what I was getting myself into before they gave me a steroid shot that had me in severe, like an 8 or a 9, pain for two hours after the medication started pumping through my right arm. But my local doctor’s office was once again running two hours behind so, therefore, they have no time to explain pesky things like terrible side effects to patients.
After the two hour long shenanigans at my doctor’s office by the time I finally, finally made it to my car there was no way on earth I could stop to donate blood this morning like I had originally planned. This sucks, I wanted to do a nice thing this morning, and there was actually a blood drive going on in our little one-horse town but I could barely drive myself home being right handed and having the shot in my right arm. There was no way on earth I could deal with more needles at the moment.
After I received the shot the nurse told me it was completely normal to have this kind of allergic reaction. She asked me what arm I wanted the shot in beforehand, why on earth she did not tell me I would be crippled on my right side for half my day, and if I’m right handed, to choose my left arm, I don’t know. So what I’m saying is, if you really are into pain and decide to get the Solu-Medrol shot, which can delay sneezing 300 times a day for 2-3 weeks (that’s three thousand sneezes!) don’t get it in the arm you use to wipe your ass and pet your dog with! ( I hope you are not doing these two activities at the same time but then again I can’t judge. I have sneezed 300 times on nearly everything I own in the last two weeks. Including the dog.)
Yes, this dog. She looks so happy because this was a month before I sneezed on her 300 times.
You know what hurts a hell of a lot less then a steroid filled allergy shot? Mixing a tablespoon of local honey into your morning coffee or tea! Delicious and you won’t feel like your arm was trampled by a herd of Clydesdales!
Like this beautiful two thousand pound lady. I may feel like Sally the Clydesdale ran over my right arm but looking back at my decision to inject corticosteroids into my body instead of more natural bee pollen or delicious local honey I feel like I made a bad decision and now I have lost half my Saturday to being prone on the couch with our new kitty cat.Okay, so I spent my Saturday off from work giving snuggle wuggles to our new kitty cat (While also clutching my arm in pain) but at least I was not sneezing for the first time in three weeks. The moral of this story is the chemical filled medication allergy shot was extremely painful and yes, it did really relieve my symptoms but passing out and being in ridicules pain was not at all worth it. Buy some bee pollen at Whole Foods or use a netti pot, instead and you can thank me later.
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