Beam me up, Leslie

 Well, I’d say from the looks of things, I have managed to piss off everyone on this small mountain in the past few days.
    From my local auto shop to the bitches at Big Bear Enterprise
    Oh yeah
    I am that girl
    Your biggest nightmare, Leslie, at Big Bear Enterprise.
   I pay a shit ton for my automobile insurance, and if that enables me to have the same class of rental car as the one I own, when I make an insurance claim and my car is in the shop, so be it.

   Let’s go back a few weeks.
   My BFF t-boned my Subaru a few weeks ago in the snow leaving a dent in my drivers side back door. She wanted to make a insurance claim and get it fixed so ten days ago I called Showtime Custom Coach our local auto shop in town and had them order the parts. That mainly meant a new door. Yes, even though it was only a dent on my door the whole door would be replaced and I would get a free rental car out of the deal for a week. Two year’s ago some one backed into my Subaru Baja in town and after some fan angling Show Time was able to supply me with a brand new Subaru to drive around for a week and it was sweet! Well, apparently some things have changed since those days and now Show Time only does their car rentals through Enterprise, boo.
    See, my insurance had okayed me for a truck or SUV, as that is what my little Subaru truck is classified as. I argued with the insurance agent over the phone that iIwanted another Subaru because hello gas is $4.50 a gallon and I am not driving a gas guzzling truck for a week. Apparently Enterprise just doesn’t have any Subaru’s in stock.  Boo, Enterprise.
    My car was supposed to be done in a week and there was no snow in the forecast and hey we decide to go to Vegas spur of the moment, so I was willing to settle for an economy car like a Ford Fusion. So I call Big Bear Enterprise Rent a Car and am told the only vehicle they have is a Dodge Durango. Than Leslie from Big Bear Enterprise precedes to try and convince me the thing gets great gas mileage. So we go round and round arguing, I do not want this big ass SUV that will cost me a fortune to drive. Finally she tells me I can take the Durango, drive it to the San Bernardino location and exchange it for something else. I agreed to this after declaring, okay but I am not paying for the gas to drive this beast down there.
    So Monday I picked up the Durango and holy shit it was ginormous! I guess I havn’t seen the new Durango’s. I was expecting a SUV that was a little bigger than a Rav 4 or a Honda CRV. Um, no. This thing was as big as an Ford Exbidition. It was like driving a train.
    Inside the thing had all the bells and whistles you could imagine; satellite radio, even back up mirrors. Really, who needs all this fancy stuff? I’m really glad I didn’t have to drive this SUV all week because it handled horrible on the mountain roads. I enjoy driving fast in the mountains; it’s fun for me. I had to drive like my grandma in this thing. I’m used to driving big SUV’s. I used to drive my Mom’s Explorer all the time. That thing is a fun mountain car. It’s the most fun car I have ever driven in the mountains to this day. Even my Dad’s big ass dually Ford truck, also drives like a train, but handles exceptional on the tight mountain turns.
   Thank god I was able to trade in the Dodge for a Ford Fusion. Which I also did not enjoy driving. I thought it would be nice having a new car for a week, but the sad thing is nothing is as nice as my eight year old Subaru. I guess once you drive a Subaru you can’t go back. I miss my all wheel drive. Every time I hit gravel, which is all the time constantly on these winter ready roads, my tires are spinning, shooting gravel every where. I miss my tar!
   Which was ‘spose to be ready today.
   I called Showtime this afternoon and they informed me that the parts arrived yesterday.
   Excuse me?
   I had them order the parts a week before I even brought the car in! Now they say my car won’t be done until at least next week some time.
   Really, how hard is it to replace a door? Does it take four days worth of work?
    I guess this is why every one calls them Slow Time.
   This really annoys me and I think it is bad business sense. I mean they should have called me with an update if my car wasn’t going to be ready on the day they said it would. And I’m sorry but if it takes that long to order parts for a Subaru, shouldn’t a mountain auto repair shop know that since they have a high volume of Subaru’s coming through for repair?
   What is really annoying is we are expecting a foot of snow both Saturday and Sunday. Luckily for me I am a Woodyard and know how to complain. So I did my best and talked my way into another different rental car. Yes, now I have a snow worthy Jeep Wrangler.
    Guess what? I don’t like it either. I know Jeeps are so popular up here but this one does not handle the mountain roads well. Once again  I am stuck driving slow, ug.
    Until I complained some more that is.
    Did I mention I’m a Woodyard?
   In the brief day I had the Jeep I named it Nigel, as the therometer was in Celsius, therefore British Jeep.
   Did I mention hate Jeep!?
   Hate Nigel!
   Okay, don’t get me wrong, the Jeep was shiny and new, big ass tires, good looking, and to bad it wasn’t summer, as the top came off.  I just hate, hate, hate driving thirty miles an hour.
   And mountain people, my people, drive like assholes.
  I pulled out every time I had a car behind me, the first turnout I came to, and yet I still had people constantly on my ass tailgating.
   The Jeep had to go, I can not live my life like this.
   Luckily I am the Goldilocks of rental cars, and was able to switch out Nigel for a four wheel drive Jeep Patriot. Which I actually kind of like. Although the style of this Jeep is butt ugly. It has a ton of power and gets awful gas mileage, but at least I wont get stuck in the snow tomorrow. It also has satellite radio which includes a TVG horse racing station, yea!
   

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